Random Thought # 14 : On Reflection

For those who don't know me already, I've been busy going through a lot of shit on a lot of different fronts. I've spent many sleepless nights, and had anxiety attacks so strong, I'd wake up soaked in sweat. My mentioning that was not to make you feel sorry for me. I'm telling you that there will be  moments in your life where you will go through it. Its incredibly difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel because once you think you see it, something else will come up, and will cause a lot of stress on you. That stress is not necessarily a bad thing because you will change for the better once you go through it. But the trick is to allow yourself to go through it, but take care of yourself as you do it.  Self care is very necessary, and whether or not you need to go through a detox, smoke tobacco, drink, etc then I recommend it. But the trick is to make sure you can stop once you have things figured out. And when you go through that stress always make sure you make strive to  make new connections each time you go through it, regardless of whether the issue is very old or very new in your life.  This allows you to give yourself time to come to a resolution on that issue. This prevents rumination, and allowing oneself to get stuck because no improvement can occur if you get stuck on the same issue.  It can cause a person to spiral into self harm or self hate, and cause you to not be nice to yourself. The trick is to find out the who, what when where why and how that issue came about. And you can strive to fix it and do so while seeing your whole intentions.

And once you do that, you will find love for yourself, and you will realize that you've being doing love work the whole time. You will realize that you are a whole person with all of your flaws, and so called imperfections.  And you will strive to do love work from that point on. You will begin to do love work for you and your people in the harshest of circumstances and the harshest of environments.


And most of all, never ever let anybody steer you wrong. Because they will have you all kinds of fucked up, caught up, and raggedy. And they love themselves for it.

As for you. Always jump back and kiss yourself and make sure whatever you do, you do it for love and not for the love of standing on top of people (supremacy). Let them do that.